I did not have a good day. I barely made it home. My breathing was labored and my head was hurting for all nine hours. I didn’t know how to process today. I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t have the courage to say hi. I felt like such a loser. I threw upContinue reading “today”
Category Archives: thinking out loud
more time
Just one of those nights when the clock keeps going and my brain won’t fucking stop. It’s on me now. It’s getting real.
생각
오늘도 생각했다. 그때를 기다리며 기도하는 나 아직 답을 찾으며 그냥 일만 하고 하루를 지냈다 오늘도 바쁜중에 생각만 하고 지내 버렸다.
seeking character (Exodus 4)
Exodus 4 brings us to a lesser known exchange between Moses and the Lord where God extends grace to doubt-filled Moses in the form of three signs. First, Moses is commanded to throw his staff that immediately turns into a snake and then Moses is commanded to grab the tail as the snake is thenContinue reading “seeking character (Exodus 4)”
friday morning reflect
The constant nature of sunrise and sunset has always been a paradox because the timing by which, relative to us, the sun would rise and set was dependent on the tilt of the axis of this planet with reference to the sun. Constant, but not really. We are used to longer hours of the dayContinue reading “friday morning reflect”
기적같이
마음이 찢어저야 된다고 합니다. 숨통이 막혀야 된다고 합니다. 황당하다는 수준을 넘어가며, 멘붕을 부르는 상황이라고 합니다. 힘이 들었습니다. 마음도 많이 아팠습니다. 눈물도 가끔씩 흐르기도 했습니다. 그러나 포기는 하지 않았습니다. 믿기힘든 상황, 믿기힘든 결정, 지금도 결과에 확신이 없는 기도를 하고 있습니다.
uneasy
Today was a day marked with uneasiness. The snow shower blanketing the roads made for an uneasy drive into the cold morning embrace of starting my day with prayer. Every conversation and revelation – being honest about the advice and the support that I feel like I’m betraying brings me uneasiness in slow syrup-like drips.Continue reading “uneasy”
road ahead
I asked us. I asked myself. The road ahead just got infinitely harder. We’ll both feel vulnerable and exposed. There’s going to be a lot of trust that needs to be rebuilt. I said I want to make this work. I don’t know how but that’s where I landed. Because someone young but wise posedContinue reading “road ahead”
where I land
Even now, I don’t know where I am. And as the title appropriately communicates – I just don’t know where I land with everything. I’m hurt. If you haven’t noticed by now. My emotional drippings of a teenage-JD being revisited has been a nostalgic callback to days of angst and anxiety. Frankly it’s really gross.Continue reading “where I land”
four hours
in the rain and traffic talking about this and that I have more clarity but still I’m weighed down by emotions I want logic and reason to win out but my heart says just one more time four hours it wasn’t long enough