jongdaeyah

The peaks and valleys of the sharing and praying brings rhythm to the whole ordeal. The prayer of the youth is unmatched in its brilliance but like a hot burning fire – it quickly burns out.

The tears of joy and pain – reconciling and forgiving one another – emotional responses to the constant soundtrack in the background bring forth sharing and prayer that audibly clash to create a feint din.

There in the midst of the eb and flow of retreat night prayer – I find myself still before the Lord.

Contemplating my questions and concerns – I feel and see and even now experience the Lord cleansing my slate.

The Lord leading me to now think soberly about what it’s going to take.

The Lord leading me to now to consider seriously what it will take for me to take the lead.

Is this worth fighting for?

I am still before the Lord to seek His voice.

I do not want and I do not look for a sign – I want Jesus

He won’t give me the answers

I don’t need answers

I just want Jesus

My painful reality needs the Son’s presence

Now. Like right now.

The sea may part to reveal the Lord before me

But far and above greater than the biggest miracle before my eyes

I am fixated on the constant and my life-long guide

He calls me to this place to find refuge

Nothing else will do

prayer still…